Sunday, October 11, 2009

Probably the very end!

It's not like you can blame me for wanting, badly I might just as well add, to look like that. Anabela and Snejana is totally adorable, skinny and................... PERFECT!
I haven't been in school for about 3 weeks, which was suppose to be a secret.. but the secret is out! They threathed once again to make me move.. but after playing some on my inocence, and cried and so on, they let me stay on some terms, though...

1) Eat, in school as well, he'll probably have someone watching me..
2) Go to school, which I want to quit btw.
3) No word-twisting
4) Be happy, well I'm ceartinly not, so pretending is obviously what my life will depend on, if I could become an actress or not!

How can they even demand such a thing? I mean the did pretty much extinguish my hope and turned all my dreams down, and the have the guts to demand happiness out of me?

Well, if this is what they want.. then I wont eat in vain anymore!
Take a look at this marveous creature, she is PERFECT for crying out loud!

In a few years, hopefully, I'll look like that. Then I'll be unstopable, I'll be PURE PREFCTION!

There is one thing I dont understand though.. Why do people have to be so jellouse? Why cant the allow me to look insanely beautiful as one of those runway models ? It's not fair, and do not tell me that life is not fair cause it would be if people cared less about eachother and more about thereselves.. But they are to retarded, egoistic, envious and ... I cant even find the right word to continue this sentens, that's incrediously bad!!!

However.. the question remains, is it worth living as a prisoner in one and half an year tops, or is suecide something to suspect?
Essyy, when/if you read this I might not be alive, and then I just want you to know that you cant give up, you have to fight it, for me and for you, for finding happiness once and for all!

1 comment:

We have the right to love ourselves said...

Fighting for both of us, yes. That is what I think every time I doubt on myself. Today I was forced though, to eat salad (60kcal or something) but that's the only intake.
I am really fighting it now! 17 is a great number (today)